Just In Case I'm Not Alone

You know what day it is!  Happy Valentine’s Day!  Today is a day of love, so do something special for your loved ones or yourself.  This day isn’t restricted to just couple's love.  It includes all love from family love, agape love, to loving a friend, and so on.  As we celebrate each other today, I want to share a secret with you.  Specifically, a secret for the single positive vibers, but everyone is welcome to read.  This is my journey beyond self-love and into loving others. 

Singleness
As a kid, Valentine’s Day was just another day to eat as much candy as I wanted.  When I got older, I realized that there was more to it than chocolate and “You’re Great” cards.  In high school, I watched as people carried around giant teddy bears and roses from their boyfriends and girlfriends.  However, none of these holiday traditions phased me.  It was every other day of the year that this thought would burn in the back of my mind:

“You’ve been single….for like a long time….no I mean, like since birth.”

I was pained by the thought.  It’s not that I knew the values of being in a relationship, I was simply convinced that singleness meant loneliness.  Today, to all of my beautiful singles please know that the latter is untrue.  From middle school to high school, cupid ran rampant marking every target he saw.  When these targets were marked and matched, they appeared happy, perfect, and ideal.  That’s where I grew confused.  I thought happiness was only found in relationships and since I wasn’t bold enough to attempt one I automatically assumed that I was alone.  This placed me in a world of stressed singleness.  My mind jumped from crush to crush creating a dangerous emotional pain.  Once I caught on to this pattern, I tried to cut it off immediately by accepting “loneliness”.  It’s a route I suggest none of you take.  My newly acquired knowledge of self-love wouldn’t allow me to remain in that state.  I surrounded myself with spiritual advice and uplifting sisterhood videos until the message rang loud and clear right through to my heart:  “You can be happy and single!”  So I tried this happy singleness.  It was a fight at first, but the results included the ability to persevere through lonely times, increasing knowledge on true love, and a heart that could effectively and genuinely love others. 
For my specific journey, I gave my singleness to God.  I had a bold and honest conversation with Him about my thoughts, wants, and fears.  I sealed “stressed singleness” away with a declaration to trust the Lord and not try to make things happen for myself.  While I’ve been resting in “happy singleness” I’ve had time to truly get to know God and HIs love for me.  In that time of being content, still, and seeking God’s face, He blessed me with a friendship.  I am now passing through the threshold into loving strangers, family, friends, and more. 

Sending out positive vibes, I encourage those who may be single to try out living happily single.  Practice patience and self-growth, so that you may be ready when your gift arrives.

Kaci Hollingsworth